Gnomes of Suburbia Page 15

  "What did you expect? Beelzebub Junior? Twit.” She kept up her private muttering through the main hall and into the kitchen. As she rested the parcel on the dining room table, she checked out the window to see what the gnomes were up to.

  Their happy frolics warmed her heart, but she did have to wonder where they got the chainsaw.

  She checked the time and cursed. It was time to enact plan A.

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  Chapter Thirty-Five

  "Laura? Are you here?"

  "Come in, Verne. Dive in. I finally decided to take Laura up on her offer of a hot tub soak and got her to lure you here.” Abby leaned back in the water and let it churn.

  "Why?” He was puzzled. It was obvious, he tilted his head to one side like a dog that just heard a funny noise.

  "You and I got off on the wrong foot. This is our chance to clear the air.” Her hair was pinned above her ears so she heard the harumph that he whispered over the noise of the tub jets.

  "I will accept your offer. I keep a suit inside, I need to change."

  Abby could bet that he didn't usually wear a suit in this tub, but she appreciated the wild sprint to his home to find one. She was getting better at tracking energy and she had focussed on his while he was standing in front of her.

  Xander she could find anywhere. He could be in the seventh circle of Hell and she would still know where he was. Stupid talent.

  Slightly out of breath, Verne re-appeared. He was wearing his swim trunks, but they were paired with his t-shirt, socks and sneakers.

  "Come on in, wolfman. Time for a chat.” Her hand splashed the surface and patted the water lightly.

  He was down to only his trunks in no time and easing into the water. “What about?"

  He lost his grip on the edge and splashed in when she said, “You and Laura.” She let him come to the surface and collect himself.

  He leaned back and tried to look non-chalant. “Laura is my mate."

  Abby sighed deeply. “Yes. I know that. But do you know why she is keeping you at arm's length instead of trying to see what babies with fur and fish tails look like?"

  He blinked at her. He wanted to know, he really did. Asking a stranger was out of the question. “I wouldn't mind hearing your theory."

  "Really? That's nice, because that is why we are here."

  "Is it?"

  "Yes, Commander Obvious."

  "Then why is Laura attempting to maintain a distance between us?"

  Abby smiled. He finally asked her a question. A good one. “There are several factors. For example, you know that she is a mermaid?"

  "Of course I do."

  "Then what will you do when she remains young and beautiful while you age?"

  "Thank my lucky stars.” He smiled.

  He actually smiled at her. He had no problem marrying a woman who would outlive him by centuries. “If you had children and they were born as mer folk, how would you feel about them being under water until they learned how to shape shift?"

  He blinked slowly. “How long would that take?"

  "Anywhere from five to eight years.” Based on his shock, Laura and Verne had not yet had this conversation. Idiots.

  "As long as I knew where to find them and could dive to visit, I suppose that I would be all right with it.” Huh, she hadn't even thought of visitation.

  "And if you couldn't visit?"

  "Then I would wait until they could join me on the surface."

  Abby pondered that, then went back on the attack. “And if your child was born were? Would your society accept it?"

  "They have taken in half-bloods before. It is not unknown.” He gave it some serious thought, and as he mulled it over, Bitsy brought out some fruit drinks. There was no alcohol in them, just fresh fruit and ice. He gave her a long look and a bow as he delivered the beverages.

  "Laura told me that anytime they offer me something with you around, I am to let you drink first from my cup."

  "See, she really does love you.” Abby grinned brightly and took sips of both beverages. They tasted the same and she handed one to Verne. He took it with a nod of thanks. “Thanks, Bitsy. The tub does get a little warm."

  "Do they speak to you?"

  "Sure they do, didn't you hear him when he came up? He said that it was to quench our thirst as this tub is rather warm."

  "He didn't say anything. His mouth didn't even move.” Verne looked concerned for her mental health.

  "But I swear I heard him."

  "You probably have some connection with your creatures that no one has discovered yet. The Nexus that created creatures did usually live and die alone."

  "Ouch. That kind of stings. So I am nuts and I can hear garden gnomes?"

  He gave another of his genuine smiles. “In a nutshell. Not the worst thing that could happen to you in this situation."

  "I suppose not. Now, for another thing that is keeping you two apart. Me."

  He sat up at that. The scowl on his face made her glad that technically he was sworn to protect her.

  "Laura was selected by the matriarch of her clan to become part of the ... I dunno ... Nexus Guard?” She shrugged. It hadn't been explained to her completely either. “She can't leave me to become a mate and if she gets pregnant and it is a mer folk baby, then she will have to leave and return to the sea. That would dishonour her clan and she won't have that."

  Stunned did not begin to describe him. “You. She. How did you find out about all this?"

  She had a smug smile on her face. “Because I asked her. About your relationship, about social conditions, about why she was here. Things you could have done, you big dummy.” He sipped quietly at his drink for a while, chewing on the information she had just flung at him. She leaned back and let the jets pulse and swirl her tension away.

  "So what about it? You wouldn't have ambushed me here if you didn't have something in mind."

  "You are very astute. I am going to be testifying in front of the council and I want to petition them for a seer vision into your future. I want them to look at all the possibilities."

  "And if her children will be mer? What will you do then? She will have to leave and she will not shame her family that way."

  "If her children will have tails, then I will petition the mer representative for permission for her to mate and reproduce with you. No shame or dishonour attached. I will ask. If he or she says no, then I will tell you and you can make your plans from there. Include a lot of birth control in those plans by the way. I am just getting used to you guys."

  Verne's face actually cracked more than a smile. He chuckled and eventually broke into a full-throated howl. Birds and squirrels ran for cover.

  Abby was surprised at his reaction until she realized that she was guaranteeing him that no matter what happened, he had what he wanted. With or without children, Laura would be his.

  She had just promised him his fondest wish. What had she gotten herself into?

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  Chapter Thirty-Six

  She let Verne return to his home or to go out and romance Laura, she had no idea. She was enjoying the play of light on the water of Laura's pool. It was so soothing.

  "So you are going to bat for Laura and Verne? Fantastic.” Seesee was behind her, but she had felt the gorgon approaching from half a block away.

  "Whenever I get sent to the council, I most definitely will. People who know that they are in love and who can maintain that love should be encouraged at any cost. Besides, the worst thing that they can say is no. I have minimal dignity so asking strangers for favours is not a difficult stretch for me. Not when there is a good cause at stake."

  "They are definitely a good cause.” Seesee looked at her, then out at the water sadly. “I wish that there was an easy fix for me."

  "Isn't the mysterious and invisible Miklos your fella?"

  "Yes. But I was referring to my inability to have children. When we were little, we were told about the costs of being
what we are. I cried for days."

  "That only the oldest daughter would have children?"

  "Yes. Three little girls, who would grow into three powerful gorgons.” She nodded and her hair hissed lightly and caught the breezes. She was quite beautiful as her hair danced in ethereal wind, her skin bronzed by the sun and tears held in her eyes.

  "But you wanted your own little baby."

  "Just one who would be mine and a man who would love me."

  "What about Miklos?"

  "He's a vampire. It's part of the reason that I started dating him. He couldn't reproduce if he wanted to. It would take a powerful spell, or an incredible burst of magic to bring him life for even an evening."

  "I can manage the magic, but that doesn't solve your problem."

  "No, it doesn't. But I suppose until I can figure out something or live without a child."

  A thought occurred to Abby and she opened her mouth.

  Seesee said, “No, I don't want one of your creatures."

  Abby shut her mouth. “Wow, Seesee. You are good."

  "I know, but it was pretty obvious where your mind was heading.” She touched Abby on the shoulder “The thought was nice, but I don't need a fake child, I need a real one."

  It was ironic that Seesee was consoling her. Abby was the one who could bring anything to life that she wanted to, as well as have kids, and she was feeling guilty about not being able to share that with her friend. She wiped the tear from her eye. She was crying where Seesee wouldn't. “Tell me about your sisters."

  "My sisters. My sisters. Well, the eldest is Melly, Amellix. She is five years older than me. My other sister is two years older than myself. Her name is Trellatrix, but we call her Tinny. That or butt head. She calls me stink bug."

  Abby couldn't contain her giggle. “What about your nieces? Do they all have x's in their names?"

  "No, they got away with g's. Gwendolyn, Gennifer and Georgia.” A smile came to her face as she thought about them.

  "Lemmee guess. You spoil them rotten?"

  "Yup. They need all the childhood they can get before their powers emerge."

  "When will that be?"

  "When they turn twenty. Each of us surrenders our powers in birth order to the next generation. I will miss it, but I have eighteen years before Georgia will be ready."

  "I suppose it would be crass to ask if the powers transferred upon death?"

  "No. Not at all. But in the modern age, we no longer live together in the same area. It is a nasty surprise to suddenly have your hair attacking the manicurist who cut your cuticle. We engage in a steady and controlled ceremony. Each one is like a wedding and a wake all in one."

  "Sounds fancy."

  "It is. Very. We buy special dresses, get our nails done and our hair styled."

  "I thought you told me that you got your powers when you were younger?"

  "My aunt died. Car accident.” Now a tear trickled from Seesee's face. For her lost childhood, her beloved aunt or the shock of the transformation. “We are bonded to the last generation at birth. My sisters got their transfer in ceremony and solemnity, I got mine in a memory of fire and blood."

  "Whoa. You got the memory as well?"

  "That is why we try to pass it along in a controlled manner. It spares the next generation a certain amount of trauma."

  "What if the eldest dies before she can reproduce her three daughters?"

  "The ability to bear will pass to the next oldest, with all the power, energy and memories of the first. The first child will get their powers immediately.” She stopped and smiled “Well, as soon as they grow hair."

  Abby was giggling again. Images of a child trying to use the downy fluff that they were born with to lift a rattle romped through her mind. “Wow. Do you have family photos?"

  "Sure. That is part and parcel for being the youngest. I keep the family archive."

  "Cool."

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  Chapter Thirty-Seven

  Her gnomes had been shopping.

  Someday she was going to get a bill for the supplies. As soon as the home and garden centers figured out where they were going. She felt slightly guilty, but only slightly. The day that they brought home a backhoe, she would worry. And possibly run screaming into the darkness. Until then, as long as they stayed reasonable, she would let them engage in petty theft.

  They were gnomes after all. It was in their makeup to take what they needed, she had designed them that way.

  She should follow their example. She stood at the window, watching her creatures and thinking about their future. Abby could only hope it was a calmer one than their first week of life. Something caught her attention. There was a sound in her vicinity and it was insistent.

  A metallic gong sound was emanating from the box on her dining table. Hmm. To open it or not to open it, that was the question. A frisson of anticipation crept up her spine and a burst of magic with it. What the hell.

  The wrapper was plain and brown, no postmark and only her name and address on the top of the parcel. The gong rang again, this time she could feel the reverberations through the box. Closer inspection with her inner eye made her sigh with relief. It had Xander all over it.

  Three layers of wrap were shredded in her haste to get to the tiny hand mirror that was making all the noise. It rang again. She picked it up and stared at it. “Hello?"

  Xander's familiar features appeared in the tiny reflective surface. “Abby. How are you doing?"

  "Fine, I suppose. Is Miranda all checked in?"

  "She is. Listen, I am sorry that I didn't spend more time with you last night."

  "It's fine.” It wasn't fine and they both knew it. She was pissed.

  "Even I can figure that one out. I am making my presentation to the council later this afternoon, can I call you this evening?"

  "You mean on this mirror?"

  "Sure, they are fantastic. Portable and no roaming charges."

  "But what if you don't want to be seen?"

  "Ah, but what if you do?"

  Oh, he had her there. The things that she could see while talking to him had her vaguely intrigued. His shirt was open, the column of his throat visible and his hair was falling over his left eye in a manner that made her want to push it back. Those golden strands were so tempting. She wanted to pound her forehead on the table. She was so easy when it came to this one particular man. She only wished she knew why. “Fine. What time?” The words were out of her mouth before she knew what was happening.

  "Around nine-thirty or so? Is that all right?"

  "You are pushing in on my bedtime, Xander."

  "I just think I need to explain a few things about me and Miranda."

  "Whatever, fine.” She let go of the mirror and the surface image of the traitorous hunk next door turned back into a reflective surface. “Jerk” Of course he only wanted to explain his relationship with Miranda. He didn't want to see how Abby was. Bastard.

  She was sulking. There was no doubt about it. She even toyed with the thought of trying to get some of the gnomes to eat the Ex-Lax éclairs. That was just wrong. She shook herself and tried to concentrate on local news only to switch the television off when the words, “Mysterious Thefts at local Home and Garden Centers have been linked to thieves dressed as garden gnomes. View security footage after this message."

  "Well hell."

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  Chapter Thirty-Eight

  It was embarrassing to be hiding from her own remote control, but she had managed to tuck in far into the back of her refrigerator. She would not be tuning in for views of her babies committing grand theft any time soon.

  Mitsy and Harby were currently tidying up from the barbeque that had been used to prepare her dinner. Ruffles was too flammable, Skint was just naked and Splint was tipsy. Her beloved Bitsy was too short to help. Mitsy and Harby both had gloves.

  Without the television to entertain her, she was forced to either visit her neighbours or g
rab her sketchbook. She picked the pencil and paper.

  The neighbours had been over enough today. She needed the quiet of her design phase. So design she did. The pencil flew over the page, sweeping in bold strokes and tracing in delicate lines. She couldn't identify what her first sketch had been so she peeled back a page and started again on a new clean white sheet.

  This one was much better. She could work out a mouth, teeth, pointed ears. Claws, limbs and wings took up the majority of the design. She had her first flying creature.

  Now, should she build it or not? It was quite a conundrum. She would have to sleep on it.

  A gong sounded and she winced. Checking her watch let her know that it was indeed nine-thirty. Punctual, he was.

  She let the gong sound four times before answering it. She was half hoping that he had given up when she lifted the hand mirror so she could see into it. Once again, it lit up immediately with Xander's face and he looked like he was ready for bed. This was going to be interesting. She settled onto her own bed and propped her torso up with pillows. He was already speaking.

  "I wanted to apologize once again for taking off without talking to you first. It was unforgivable."

  She couldn't stop herself from sniffing in disdain. “You wanted to make sure your ex was all right. I understand that. I don't have to like it, but I understand it.” She was proud of herself for being so calm. The art therapy had worked.

  "That wasn't why ... damn!” He rubbed at his hair with one hand and the strands tousled in a light and delicate mess. “That wasn't it."

  "What was it then? I am very curious.” She snuggled deeper into her pillows. The soft surface comforted her almost as well as a stuffed animal would.

  "Abby, she tried to kill you."

  "I know. I was there."

  "Well, her talent didn't stop when she was knocked out. As soon as she came to again, she would be able to do it again.” His hand was back in his hair. “She tried to kill me twice on the way to the council. It was only the two guards that were sent to us that stopped her from killing me. Since I was not the driver, it wasn't as bad as it could have been."