Going Cold Read online

  Hesker’s eyes opened as she was surrounded by darkness. She was still sitting on the cafree and leaning precariously over, but her lips were still in contact with Valat’s mouth, and his lips were moving.

  She felt what he was doing, and she tried to mimic him. When she did, her pulse sped up. His lips were firm with a soft texture, and as they moved, something tripped in her chest, and she suspected that it was her heart.

  Hesker clutched at his shoulder with her left hand and felt the cool waves of his hair over her fingers. He relaxed his grip, and she slowly lifted her head.

  He was still amorphous darkness, but there was a smugness to him now.

  She narrowed her eyes. “So, why are you in this form?”

  He spoke slowly. “This is my natural form. The Nyal form is what I use to get around without generating comment.”

  “Oh. That makes sense then.” She smiled. “I have seen you like this a few times. It looks uncomfortable to squash yourself into that other form.”

  “I can take any form. It just takes practice.” He smiled. “You are much less alarmed than I imagined.”

  “This is what you look like. So what?” Her own body had lived a completely different and brutal life before she had been reset. The body she was wearing now did not quite feel like the same one she had lived in for over five decades.

  “You are an extraordinary being. Do you know that?”

  The hand stroked her hair, and she recognized the gesture from the mandatory hairstyling.

  “My confirmation of that situation comes and goes. So, do you look like your father or your mother?”

  “I have my father’s aura and my mother’s temperament for destruction.”

  “Oh. Right. She’s a little hostile.”

  He chuckled. “She is protective. She does not want me stumbling into the embrace of an unworthy woman.”

  “She wants to pick your wife?” As she spoke to him, he got taller until she was staring into his moving shadows.

  “Yes and no. She likes the idea of me finding a wife; she does not like the process by which I would find a wife.” His voice held the rumble of thunder as he continued to expand.

  “If you are going to explode or something, can you let me get to a safe distance?”

  His chuckle rumbled across the meadow. “I am just stretching a little.”

  She nodded. “Fine, but if you get too close and your junk is near my head, I am going to find something to hit it with.”

  “Noted.”

  He moved away from her and ended up around twelve feet tall, and his energies snapped and twisted silently around him. He looked like a grim reaper. The thought made her smile.

  “Why are you smiling? I don’t object, but that is not the normal reaction to my transformation.”

  “My people have a frightening creature that looks like you.”

  “Ah? What does it do?”

  “It harvests souls at the moment of death.”

  He chuckled. “That is close to what I am known for.”

  She blinked slowly. “What?”

  “I am called Summoned Death. I am the Nyal Imperium executioner. I receive a warrant, teleport to the site, carry out the warrant, and return to the ship to continue our travels. I am informing you as I will not always be able to be at your beck and call.”

  “That’s fine.”

  He chuckled and resumed his Nyal form before he got back on his mount. “So you say, but the one time I left you, you ate Kadar rations and got drunk.”

  She made a face. “You still need to show me how to use the food dispenser.”

  He chuckled. “I will. Would you care for another race?”

  “Where are we racing to?”

  “Back to the keep?”

  “Okay.” She nodded and turned her restless mount around.

  “Would you care to wager?”

  “No. You cheat.”

  He laughed. “I do. I play to win.”

  She let out a small noise. “There isn’t anything to be won here that cannot be requested.”

  He paused. “What?”

  “You can always just ask.” She smiled and got her cafree moving. “Go!”

  She leaned forward and enjoyed the feeling of exhilaration that ran through her with every stride.

  She glanced behind her, and his dark form had taken over again as he closed the distance. Seen this way, he was intimidating. She almost felt a trill of fear. Almost.

  Chapter Nine

  She giggled at the stares of some of the locals as they rode side by side through the streets. When they thundered into the keep, his parents were standing near a small garden area.

  Hesker pulled up, and her beast was happy and stomping. It seemed the more it ran, the more it wanted to. Valat’s mount looked smug.

  Valat’s father smiled at them, and she worked on sliding down the side of the beast. The five feet to the ground got longer as she inched to the ground. Valat caught her, his long black fingers wrapped around her waist.

  “Are you good?” His low voice boomed over the enclosed area.

  “My thighs and butt are sore, but that was fun. Thank you.”

  He chuckled and held her until she was stable on her feet, and then, he took the beasts and led them back to the stable.

  She was rubbing her backside when his parents walked up. Thokoth-Kadar looked at her with amused surprise. “You are not upset at his appearance?”

  “I have seen it before, but now, I know what I was looking at.” She looked over at Harina. “How is she?”

  “I have put her back together, again. You pulled your attack, and for that, I am grateful.”

  She shrugged. “I would have continued if I had not been asked to stop.”

  “And for that, I am grateful. Harina came here with the intent to kill me, and she stayed for love.”

  Hesker chuckled. “And because killing a planetary avatar is incredibly difficult.”

  Thokoth-Kadar nodded. “That is also a factor. Why are you so versed in the finer points?”

  “I spent a lot of time with Imbolt kei Zanican as my only conversational partner. He warned me about other avatars not being particularly concerned about the wellbeing of those around them.”

  “Ah. So, he said we are not always pleasant.”

  “Correct. Not all avatars have my best interest at heart.”

  Thokoth-Kadar nodded. “That is true. If you tried to injure my son, I suppose I would have to hunt you down and destroy you.”

  She nodded. “I suppose you would have to try.”

  “You don’t think I could?”

  “You very likely would, but you are not going to come out unscathed. I rather like being alive.”

  “You don’t even have a weapon of your own.”

  Hesker nodded. “That is true, but I am less than a week out of a tank that rebuilt me. I am sure I will improve with time. Oh, and I am technically an envoy, so I am not supposed to be armed. That would cause the wrong idea. I am pretty good hand-to-hand, though.”

  She felt a crushing weight on her mind, and her earliest memories were sifted through. Early training, the first murder, the second, endless rounds of death for hire. Training, beatings, and killing while she tried to go to school. The Volunteer Project had been her out, and her parents had confronted her with the acceptance letter, breaking her arms to keep her from leaving but keeping the breaks precise.

  She had sat in the hospital bed and watched the volunteer shuttle leaving the Earth. She had cried that day. It was her one chance at normal.

  The next thirty years blurred by as she travelled the world to kill for a price collected by her parents. That was her job, and when her chance to leave had come again, she took it.

  She had been standing behind Minerva with a blade to her throat, and Minerva-Gaia had spoken calmly to her and offered her the chance to leave and be reborn again.

  She knew what she nee
ded to do, and her parents died of monoxide poisoning that night. They would not be given a second chance to keep her with them.

  Thokoth-Kadar blinked when he finished her memories. He frowned. “I am sorry. That was not a chosen life.”

  She rubbed her forehead. “It’s fine. It’s over. This is a second chance to live, and I intend to take it. No one is going to get between me and the stars.”

  “What about my son?”

  Hesker smiled. “What about him? He has been careful with me and is helping me ease into a new life, and he appears to understand my limited upbringing.”

  His eyes flicked to the cuff on her wrist. “Are you attracted to him?”

  “I don’t know. I get relaxed when he is around. That is new.” Hesker nodded. “I am getting used to being... me.”

  Thokoth-Kadar smiled, but it was Kadar that said, “It seems that your world knew your value on sight. I shall have to send her my thanks. Finding a match for my son has been awkward.”

  “Uh, be that as it may, Harina does not like me.”

  Thokoth-Kadar chuckled. “Harina only likes myself and our son. Anyone else is suspicious. She has chased off over a dozen women who were willing to consider meeting Harikoth, and I have despaired of him finding a partner.”

  “Why do you have to find me a partner, Father?” He came back, and he was still dark and deadly.

  Thokoth-Kadar smiled. “We don’t, but we know it was the real reason that you headed to the stars. The women we brought here were not suitable.”

  “And Mother tried to kill them.”

  Thokoth-Kadar sighed. “It is her instinct to defend you.”

  “Against lovers? Father, even you must admit that it goes pretty far.” He stood next to his father and took Hesker’s fingers in his grip.

  She looked down at the shadow of his hand with the deadly blades on the tips of his fingers. She squeezed his hand with hers.

  Harina approached slowly. “Will you stay for dinner?”

  Hesker looked up at him, and he was a bit taller when she wasn’t on a cafree. The spectral display of him had to be over seven and close to eight feet tall. His height depended on which way he was facing.

  He shrugged. “If you can behave yourself, we will stay for dinner. There needs to be non-Kadar options.”

  His mother smiled and then frowned. “Why?”

  Hesker inclined her head. “I don’t properly metabolize Kadar food.”

  Harina frowned. “What happens?”

  “I get intoxicated.”

  “Oh. Well, so you can eat it, but you shouldn’t. Very well, I will tell the cooks. They started on dinner, but there is room for a few items.”

  “I can put a few small items together if I can. That way, your people won’t have to worry.”

  Valat asked in surprise, “You can cook?”

  Thokoth-Kadar chuckled. “She can cook.”

  He looked at his father. “What did you do?”

  “I went through her mind. She has a fascinating history. Do you know about it?”

  “She will tell me when it is time.”

  Hesker said, “In all honesty, I might not.”

  He looked at her, and he chuckled. “No, I suppose it does not match your clean start.”

  “I don’t want a clean start. I know that I am not wired to standard operation. I want my reset. I think the way I think and act the way I act because of what I am, not what happened to me after I was an adult.” She smiled. “My people have a descriptor for people like me. Psychopath. I do not attach to people or things properly. Well, properly by their standards. If someone is not useful to me... they have no value. Unless there is a price on their heads, then they do.”

  Thokoth-Kadar nodded. “Her parents controlled her with pain and tethers. It was exceedingly cruel and rather ingenious.”

  Hesker wiggled her fingers. “I am going to make myself something to eat. Your dad can give you the details. His search was very thorough.”

  Valat sighed. “I don’t want to let go.”

  “I can’t cook with one hand, and you are too big to move around in the kitchen.”

  “Can I get a hug?”

  She sighed and turned to him, wrapping her arms around him. Hesker buried her face against him and sighed. “You only have to ask.”

  She felt relaxed and comfortable with his long fingers rubbing over her back until she leaned back and looked up at his shadowed self. “I have to go now, or the food won’t get done.”

  He sighed. “I understand.”

  He let her go, and she nodded. “Right, Lady Harina, which way to the kitchen?”

  “In through the main doors to the back of the keep. You will smell the scents of cooking. Tell the head cook who you are.”

  Hesker nodded and left the gathering.

  The weapons on the wall of the keep made her smile and her palms itch, but she kept going until she was standing in the kitchen. Three women were moving around and chatting as they cooked, but that came to a halt as they saw her.

  “Hello. Are you Yanna?”

  The older of the three nodded. “I am. Who are you?”

  “I am Dame Hesker of the Nyal Imperium. I would like to make myself some food. Is there a space where I can work out of the way?”

  Yanna stiffened. “We are the cooks.”

  “I cannot eat Kadar food. It does not agree with me. I need to mix something for myself.”

  Yanna blinked. “Oh. How will you eat the food here then?”

  “I will check it for compatibility.”

  She held out her left hand and scanned the raw items in the kitchen. She smiled. “I can eat these things.”

  She picked up some eggs and some starchy vegetables. “Where can I prepare them?”

  Yanna pointed to a portion of the counter. “Over there is fine. Do you need a knife?”

  “Yes, please. Thank you.”

  Hesker set her items down and slipped off her jacket, tying it around her waist. She took the eight-inch paring knife, scraped the skins off the vegetables with rapid motions of the back of the knife, moved the shreds aside, and then she chopped them up in a handful of heartbeats.

  She found a frying pan and an empty element and asked, “Is there any fat I can use? And a small bowl?”

  They gave her the items while the silence reigned in the kitchen. She smiled and started humming the tune that Valat and her had danced to.

  Yanna blinked. “I know that one.” They started singing it, and the kitchen got back to work again.

  The eggs were whisked, seasoned, a bit of cream was added, and she poured it on top of the browned vegetables. Frittatas weren’t difficult, and the vegetables were not precisely potatoes, but they weren’t going to poison her.

  She hummed along with the other ladies, and when she slid the food under the grill, she turned to find that they were plating up a tremendous amount of food that would definitely make her want to pick a fight.

  She waited for five minutes, and then, she peeked at her lunch. The tip of the knife went in easily, so she pulled it out and pressed a plate to the surface before flipping it over. It looked like a respectable creation.

  She picked up her plate and headed into the hall where a table had been set for the family. Valat was back in his Nyal form, and he patted the chair next to his, and she walked over, setting her plate down before she untied her jacket and put it back on.

  Hesker sat and smiled. “I am sorry if you were waiting.”

  Harina frowned. “What is that?”

  “Eggs, some kind of tubers, and spices with a bit of cream.”

  Valat looked over at it. “It looks good.”

  “Thanks. I have no idea what it tastes like, but it won’t make me itchy.” She nodded.

  Thokoth-Kadar chuckled. “It is a good time of year for those. They have the most nutrients in their entire life cycles.”

  She nodded. “That usually means it ta
stes like dirt, but if I can try it now, I would like to.”

  Valat smiled. “Go ahead. We are just going to watch you eat.”

  She shrugged and sliced the frittata into wedges before sliding one piece onto her plate. She had brought the paring knife with her.

  She cut a section of the still-hot food with her fork and stabbed it. She blew on it for a moment and put the bite in her mouth. She raised her brows. “It’s pretty good. At least to my taste.”

  Valat smiled. “May I try it?”

  She nodded toward one of the slices she had prepped. “Help yourself.”

  She took a second bite, and she saw that Harina and Thokoth-Kadar were looking at her curiously.

  She sighed. “You can have some, too. As long as I get to eat a third of the whole, that will be enough.”

  They all had a slice, and they ended up smiling when they finished their pieces.

  “I can give Yanna the recipe.”

  Harina was looking longingly at the remainder of the frittata. “Perhaps one more piece?”

  Hesker shook her head. “No. This is the only thing that I can safely eat on this table. You have a feast in front of you. Eat it.”

  Harina blinked and looked to Thokoth-Kadar. “Can she talk to me like that?”

  “Apparently, dearest. Never get between an apex predator and food. You know that.”

  She pouted, and Yanna said, “I believe I can replicate the food, if not the knife speed.”

  The cook was standing near the door to the kitchen. Hesker got up and returned the knife to her. “Thank you for the use.”

  “It was my pleasure. You are very capable with a knife.”

  Hesker smiled. “On my world, folks are all about projectile weapons, but they are noisy and primarily have the advantage of reducing the amount of residue at the scene. There are few things as anonymous as a knife. I, however, name my knives, so I will wait until I have my own once again.”

  Yanna blinked at that. “Oh. Right.”

  “Sorry. Excuse me. I am prone to outbursts.”

  She returned to her seat, and the other three were staring at her.

  Valat blinked. “You name your knives?”

  “Yeah. All of them. I started naming stuff in your room at the ship but then remembered that they are not mine to name.” She kept eating. Apparently, cafree riding burned a lot of calories.